Monday, April 30, 2007

The Heartbreak of Hail Damage

It's been a rather difficult day in Bizzyville. I was brought low by a Tsunami of a sinus headache that began last night and lasted well into the day. Many aspirin and a 24-hour prescription Clarinex later, I am, thankfully, recovered.

Earlier, while still on the couch, I caught the Tyra Banks show. Her theme today was "Hot Legs" and how to get them and look great in summer shorts. I have to admit that, in my headachey condition, I wasn't paying too much attention. Or I wasn't, that is, until they began discussing Nivea "Good-bye Cellulite" patches which, even through the fog of my headache, caused my ever-sensitive beauty-product-junkie-ears to perk up. (Annoyingly, I cannot link straight to the product, but you can get to it by visiting the Nivea website and clicking to it for more information.)

Because, let's face it girls, is there anything more annoying than or as impossible to get rid of as cellulite or, as it has come to be known recently, "hail damage" (a tragically appropriate moniker). Now, I realize that no doubt Nivea is paying through the nose for Tyra's endorsement but, I have to admit, for some reason, I don't think Tyra would showcase a product with faked results. On the show today, she profiled three different women who had used the patches for four weeks in before-and-after videos.

And the results were nothing short of amazing. Providing they were real. There was one woman? At least 300 lbs. Trust me. Initially, she had a case of hail damage so bad that it was present both on the backs AND fronts of her thighs. Four weeks later? Gone. Totally gone. (And, by the way, she was no thinner than she had been when she started the process).

All three of the participating women stressed that you have to use the product as directed for the FULL four weeks to get the results and that nothing much changed the first two weeks. BUT, if they are to be believed, after a full four weeks of treatment, their hail damage was NO MORE.

What if it really does work? Is all I'm saying.

Also, you're probably wondering what's new in my world organizationally? Well, funny you should ask. My friend Christina rolled into town last week and wrought an organizational miracle in my barn during her stay. Alas, I did not take "before" photos, so it would be hard to fully appreciate the miracle that after really is. I think I can adequately illustrate the situation by telling you that Christina unearthed FIVE SEPARATE GAS CANS. You know, the kind you fill up your mower from? Evidently, when Satan was too traumatized by the state of the barn to search for the gas can, he just went to Wal-Mart and bought another one.

FIVE TIMES (not that I blame him).

Maybe now you can understand why we have a barn AND a semi trailer. Which, by the way, I'm planning to take you on a tour of soon. So--something to look forward to, eh?

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