Wednesday, October 29, 2008

We interrupt this blog to bring you the following special report...

The crime: Disappearance of 20+ golden mini-Snickers bites, last seen in a bowl on living room coffee table on 29, October, 2008, 0900 hours.

The suspects:

Tallulah Priscilla.
AKA: Snowflake

Former convictions: Destruction of toilet paper by aggravated shredding, 04 September, 2008; Kibbles -n- Bits hijacking from neighbor, Dudley, (10 convictions--regularly risks arrest number 11); cyberterrorism via bitten laptop cord (2 convictions resulting in $200 damage, embarrassing blog posts and general mayhem and foolishness on the home front).

Special skills: Looking innocent; creating a distraction via explosively odoriferous, lightening quick excrement sculpture; selective hearing.

Suspect should be considered armed with extreme cuteness including little pink ears and stumpy widdle legs.

Alibi: Suspect claims to have been incarcerated by handler at the time of the golden Snicker mini-bite incident.

AKA: FurGirl, FurBag, FurFace, FurBall

Former convictions: Prison breaking 10, December, 2007; , impersonating a lap dog (10+ convictions); terroristic threatening of defenseless Steak-Out delivery person (regularly).

Special skills: Smelling funny, systematic shredding and ingestion of sticks and twigs, breaking and entering via wedging snout between door knob and jam.

Suspect should be considered capable of short-lived ferociousness followed by prolonged outbursts of napping and extreme disinterest.

Alibi: Suspect....ah...well...was...ah...didn't do it. (Officers report this statement was followed by a belch that left a faint trace of the scent of milk chocolate in the air).

If YOU have any information that might lead to the arrest or conviction of the perpetrator, there's a golden Snicker mini-bite in it for ya.


SuSaw said...

Sure you weren't sleepwalking again?

Did you smell everyone's breath?

Laura K said...

Susaw took my comment.....

Suzanne said...

Ouch. Ya'll? I am OFF THE LUNESTA. Pinky swear.