Saturday, September 06, 2008

Because I Care...


I have the coolest friends, I really do. Monica gifted me with a pad of the Fashion Citations pictured above (click for a larger version).

Many laughs have ensued, but no citation has been issued. Much as I like to comment on fashion, I still don't fancy myself as the actual Fashion Police. Well, not yet anyway (but stay tuned).

While sharing the pad with friends and having lots of yuks over the various offenses, I have been alarmed by several people who've actually asked the question, What IS camel toe? (Offense #3).

And, people, this worries me. A girl who doesn't know what a camel toe is could be in grave danger of developing one of her own.

Ya'll? Friends don't let friends have camel toe.

So, from the blogger who brought you the front butt (tm), I hereby present Camel Toe 101 for what I hope is the no more than the 10% of you who are actually in the dark about what it might be.

First off, let's examine the origin of the term, the toe of an actual camel:



Hmmm....think about it....

Put simply, "camel toe" is a word that describes female front butt cleavage. Something nobody ever wants to experience coming from you. A case of camel toe is usually the result of too-tight, crotch gripping pants. When present, it is always horrifying and should be avoided at all costs.

Naturally, Britney Spears would be an offender:

The worst case of camel toe in recorded history:

Need I say more?
Don't let this happen to you or those you love. Always check for camel toe in the dressing room when trying on new trousers. As a precaution, I recommend a CT scan in your full length mirror every morning after you're fully dressed and before you face the world. Vigilance is absolutely key in the war on camel toe. Together, we can beat this thing.

9 comments:

Nikki D. May said...

The world is a better place because you are in it. Keep fighting the good fight!

Brenda said...

I CANNOT quit LAUGHING...!

Suz said...

I think I'm traumatized by those pictures.

Aynex Mercado said...

That is the most disgusting thing and I can't believe you put it in your blog. EWWW!!

Jeanna said...

I had a high school acquintance who was guilty of camel toe on a regular basis. Why didn't someone (me) do her a favor and tell her?

Well, I really didn't like her.

Suzanne said...

Jeanna:

Note to self: don't be an ostrich about camel toe.

Jeanna said...

Please, please, please tell me you're not telling me I am guilty of such a sick fashion crime! Please!

Suzanne said...

NOOOOO...I'm suggesting you were once an Ostrich ABOUT camel toe (that girl in HS).

But now I'm noting you didn't like her.

Jeanna said...

Whew!