Scary Kate and Ghastly Olsen, among other things

I couldn’t resist popping by to share with you this:

On a good day, itsy and her even littler sister bitsy both strike me as soulless little robo-stars. But this make-up treatment? Yikes. Imagine waking in the middle of the night to find these two standing silently over your bed staring at you with their COLD DEAD EYES. Your mouth opens in a soundless scream as they bend their teensy expressionless faces to yours and sink their needle-like incisors into your neck....MWWWaaaaahahahaa…. ((shiver))

Okay, movin’ on, you should be aware that the soon-to-be Mrs. Tom Cruise has decided to be a stay at home mom!!!! Yay!! Whew! What a relief! For a minute there, I was afraid Baby Cruise would be subjected to some kind of FREAKY and unnatural upbringing or something.

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On a less snarky note...gosh, ya’ll, it’s just a good thing I’m the technical wizard that I am.

Since starting this here blog back in the olden days (September) I’ve wondered how many people visit and read. And, lo, many times after logging off, I would say to myself, “Self? Wonder just how many hits this here site gets?” I would then reply to myself, “How’s a feller to know?” And then my other self would respond, “?” and that’s pretty much where the conversation would end. Well, except for the dueling banjos twanging in the distance, that would continue for a few minutes afterward.

So, today, after stepping into my favorite overalls, latching the bib on only one side, and munching thoughtfully on a long stick of hay, I went to the Blogger “help” page and typed “hit counter” into that there blank space they got there.

And, dad gummit, you’ll never guess what? This here page come up that said, “Hey, Otis! You want one them thar hit counters? Just go ahead on and push this here button!” And so I pushed that button and this next page come up that said, “Hey, Otis! You want a FREE hit counter? Then push this here button!” And so I went on and done it, and do you know whut?

That’s all there was to it.

And right after that, that mangy mutt of a dog of mine yakked up a big pile of partially digested grass and chewed up stick onto my brand new floor. But that’s another story.

The point is, I really am the Walter Brennan of internet technology.

Just so you know.