Monday, June 09, 2008

Traumatized

Gopher. Mary-Anne. Horshack. The Fonz. Nellie Oleson. JJ Evans Jr. Laverne and Shirley. Beaver Cleaver. Dorothy, Rose, and Blanche.

If they're a TV star of yore and they still have a pulse, they were likely at the TV Land Awards, and, inexplicably, often hoisted above the crowd on a steel cable. (You tell me.) My apologies for furnishing a link to the photos. It's like you don't want to know, but you can't help yourself.

Oh, also inexplicably featured: Vanessa Williams floating on the aforementioned steel cable above the stage as the cast of has-beens wave around what look to be flashlights made to look like...I don't know...torches, maybe? Seriously.

5 comments:

Brenda said...

OMG! I could go on and on about this!

Jerry Mathers and Gary Coleman look the most pathetic to me, followed by Vanessa Williams. And it's obvious that Cindy Williams' last lift was done by Priscilla Presley's plastic surgeon. Actually, the Golden Girls look more natural than most. Apparently, they've realized they're too old for more lifts, so they just got themselves all powdered and painted up and went ahead on to the awards show...ha!

Suzanne said...

I don't know...Greg Brady is pretty sad all around. And what was UP with Roseanne Barr's THREE INCHES of obvious gray roots? I mean WHY would she not ATTEND to what is clearly an emergency situation?

On second thought the star of "Celebrity Rehab" has to take the Pathetic Prize. Some guy from Taxi.

Suzanne said...

P.S. I think Bea Arthur had a stroke.

Suz said...

You nailed it. I had to look too.

I agree with Brenda: the three Golden Girls look pretty darn good - compared to the rest of that bunch. If any of those three has been nipped or tucked, it's been subtle. Those three actors were playing old(er) women a long time ago so maybe they don't feel such pressure to look "young" - after all these years.

Cindy Williams' face in that picture is so worst case scenario, the outcome I dread whenver I think about having any work done. Well, that and the likelihood of deep debt and/or eventual bankruptcy...

Suzanne said...

Hmmm...financial stability and a saggy face or deep debt, no jowls and that mysteriously "well rested" look. Tough call.