Further Conversations with Satan

(My cell phone rings)

ME
Hello?

SATAN
Hello?

ME
Hello?

SATAN
Hey. I’m driving back from a meeting…

ME
Hmm….

SATAN
Listing to that NPR show, you know the one, umm….

ME
All Things Considered?

SATAN
No.

ME
Fresh Breeze?

SATAN
No.

ME
Okay, don’t know.

SATAN
Anyway, they’re talking about blogs.

ME
Yah?

SATAN
And, it’s a big deal.

ME
What is?

SATAN
What you write. Professionally, I mean.

ME
Like this is news to me? Anyway. I don’t write about work. Ever.

SATAN
No, you just call me SATAN!

ME
And?

SATAN
People could take that the wrong way.

ME
But, obviously, it’s meant to be humorous.

SATAN
ANYONE could read it and take it the wrong way.

ME
Like I said, I thought about all this sort of thing before I started. I don’t write about work or…

SATAN
BUT, not everybody THINKS like YOU.

ME
So, what, someone is going to get offended because YOU DON’T LIKE BANGS?

SATAN
NO, someone is going to read “SATAN” and assume I’m sacrificing BABY BUNNIES in the BACK YARD…

ME
You mean you’ve quit?

SATAN
(click)